Now we have had a few hours since the ” incident”, I thought I would share with you my observations of what followed.

As soon as Michael realised his wallet was gone, we immediately retraced our steps, which just happened to be 90 stairs ( we know this because it was sign posted as if to warn people of our age and fitness levels) and which explained why the majority of people who got off the same Metro train as us waited near a lift. Michael actually thinks this is where he was robbed as the line up and bustle at this elevator was quite distracting.

Needless to say we did not find the wallet on any of the 90 steps nor did we find someone looking for a person who had just lost his wallet.

As soon as we got to a ticket office, Michael tried to explain to the three Metro employees in his best Year 10 French that he had been robbed and his wallet was missing, presumed stolen.

My observations of what happened next follow.

Firstly there was the shrug. All three of the Metro workers appeared to do this in unison. Which I took to understand as “bad luck Chuck!” An expression our children will understand.

Next came the rolling of the eyes when they comprehended the wallet had been stolen. My interpretation of this was ” You idiot Englishman. Don’t you realise this is a common problem and why weren’t you more careful.”

When Michael then ( I thought quite bravely) asked if there was a Lost Property Office, he was greeted with (I think) a smirk and controlled laughter, which I took to mean the same as the rolling eyes response (described above).

Finally, he was then treated with ignore and moving onto the next customer, which we both took as “Piss off”.

And we did.

We did discuss going to a Police Station but decided that his old favourite wallet and the cash ( approximately $300) would not be replaced. So you’ll be pleased to know, we have ” moved on”.